Implications of the theory of boredom

I guess boredom is more a universal phenomenon than anything else. Sample this text I received during the classes today...

"Congratulations! You are one of the lucky twenty randomly selected people in my phonebook who I have texted this useless message in order to distract me from the unbearable boredom of Criminal Procedure class! To claim your prize, text "HORNYBOY 143" to 666-26733 (that's "666-BORED"). Once again, Congratulations!

Thank you for your valuable time. Vote for Jackie Chan. Vande Mataram. Gotta catch 'em all. I wanna large cheese burst and fries."

It's interesting to note how the emotion of boredom somehow always directs the movement of the mind towards baser instincts like food, sex and political ambition. The theory is simple. Had there been no boredom in the world (and for good measure...beyond), there would have been no hungry people, pedophiles or politicians. Humanity would have been way too interested in what happened to interest it at the time to be aware of anything much else, leading to a happy forgetfulness of dinner time, genitalia and gandhi caps.

Consider this. The artist, an epitome of the sex-maniac, will go on working on a muse without bothering in the least about sex. But as soon as he starts getting bored of all the painting business, he'll head upto some sleazy bar, get trashed, and paint the town red, so to say. Case in point: Vincent van Gogh, an avid painter most of his life, who noticeably contracted syphilis once he got bored of all the brush-dipping and broke his palette into two, while swinging it out of the window.  

Vincent van Gogh's reaction upon being diagnosed

with syphilis

Sherlock Holmes. Mostly a harmless cocaine addict. But push him into a time of a slack of cases--a period of utter boredom, and he'll become a hearty eater, gobbling down tons of Mrs. Hudson's ostensible delicacies. He'll even go as far as to give up on the crack, thus causing grave economic distress, by disturbing the entire chain of demand and supply, consequent of less food and more coke in the world (and for good measure...beyond).

Holmes enjoying a cigar after injecting himself with a seven percent solution of cocaine using a special syringe which he carried in a leather case

The theory gains even more impetus when it comes to politics. Mohandas Gandhi, tired of getting thrown out of trains and stuttering in courtrooms, came to India only to immerse himself in the local politics. Laloo Prasad Yadav, bored of riding buffaloes all day long, decides to champion the cause of...erm...Laloo Prasad Yadav. Naxalites, bugged by sitting all day long in forests while mosquitoes feast on them, decide to blow up railway tracks for something interesting to do, thereby make a mark in the political arena.

Naxalites in forests, bored of sitting around with nothing to do

Such observations bring us to the imperative conclusion that boredom is probably the root of all things evil. Important to note that craving for food, sex and ambition, roughly corresponds to gluttony, lust and pride in the Deadly Sins' List. Yet funny that the United Nations Millennium Development Goals are bent on stuffing everyone with food, encouraging people to have sex while supplying free condoms, and teaching kids so that they can now poke their noses into others' business more effectively. And at the same time plunging everyone into the incredibly boring "debate" of environmental sustainability. One wonders about the ulterior motives of our politically bored charged leaders.

Just a random fact: 

A very solid evidence illustrating the strong relationship between boredom, food, and sex can be found here.